Making a decision to end a relationship with an abusive partner is often difficult. For some women, it is the desire to protect their children that brings them to the point of asking for help. Taking action is hard because domestic abuse usually takes place over a long period of time and a woman's self-esteem and confidence are slowly eroded. She becomes isolated from her community. A woman may also remain in an abusive relationship because she is afraid of what family members may say or because she lacks financial resources. She may worry about compromising her partner's professional status in the community. Often, she still has hope that the abuse will stop and that her partner will come to his senses. Each woman knows when she is ready to leave an abusive relationship. When she does, she can take the first step toward ending the abuse by asking her midwife, other medical care provider, the police or her employer-assistance program for help.

If you feel ready to leave your home, it will be helpful to have put aside some things that you will need. It may be safer to keep those items at a neighbor's or a friend's house.

• Extra set of car keys
• Cash, checkbook or credit cards
• Driver's license and social security cards (for you and your children), green card, passport or work permit
• Clothes for yourself and your children
• Birth certificates
• Children's school records
• Health insurance cards
• Court papers or court orders
• Lease agreements or mortgage payment book

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Domestic Violence

What is domestic violence?

Are you at risk?

How can you tell if you are in an abusive relationship?

How can domestic violence affect pregnancy?

How does violence affect other children?

How to get help.